7 Habits of Highly Effective Family Dinners by Jennifer Lee Tyler l Parenting Advice l Parenting Tips l How to Cook for a Family l Family Dinner Tips l Family Dinner Ideas l Cooking for a Family

Home cooking may be the solution to the massive health crisis we face. But how do busy families make family dinners actually happen? And when you do make time to cook, how do you get your kids to eat what you make? The solution is simple - and it starts with one new food.

Countless studies point to the benefits of gathering your family around the table for a home cooked meal - better test scores, less risky behavior in teens, healthier kids, and stronger family connections. But the reality of actually making family dinner happen on a regular basis, without food fights, is a challenge for many parents.

In my experience raising two young children, and helping thousands of others, I’ve discovered a common thread. In my new book, The 52 New Foods Challenge, I share the seven core principles - habits - that lead to highly effective family dinners. The secret is to think like a kindergartener and to start by making it a game.

Habit #1: Focus on Fun, Not Food

Getting your kids to eat wholesome foods is just like dating. You wouldn’t decide to get married on a first date, so why would you expect your kids to fall in love with Brussels sprouts the first time they meet? They need to have fun getting to know each other! Forget about tasting and focus on exploring. Head to the farmers’ market and find something new and surprising - like Brussels sprouts on the stalk. Pick up a pomegranate and experiment with the easiest way to get the seeds out (hint: a bowl of water is the trick). At the grocery store, challenge your kids to load the cart with color (aim for five). The more you focus on having fun, as opposed to pushing for tasters, the faster you’ll see the changes you’d like to make.

Habit #3: Let Kids Lead

The secret to making lasting changes in the way your family eats is to not just involve your kids, but to let them lead - in everything from choosing food for your meals to preparing the dishes. An easy place to start is with your weekly meal plan. Let your kids pick which day of the week they’d like to be in charge of the menu, then invite them to select the recipes and name the dishes. Even better if you cook together, and let them serve the meal. Do not have a separate kids menu. It’s fine to prepare dishes in a way that allows everyone at the table to assemble to their preference - more or less onion, sauce on the side - but it’s important for everyone to be eating the same meal. When you give thanks, invite your child to share why they added their dishes to the menu, and what they would change the next time they make them with you.

Habit #4: Try One New Food

Do you serve the same three dishes every week because it’s the only thing your kids will eat? Then you’re stuck in a food rut, and you’re not alone. Here’s the problem: the key to health is variety, so you need a simple plan for boosting diversity at your dinner table. What worked for my family, and thousands of others, was to try one new food each week. Head to the market or grocery store together and let your kids pick something new that piques their interest - putting them in charge of your adventure is the key to getting (and keeping) them engaged. They’ll be much more likely to give something new a try if they’ve had a hand in bringing it to the table.

Habit #5: Avoid Airplane Foods

We are fortunate to live in a country where, for many people, it’s easy to find an apple - or watermelon or strawberries - any time of year, regardless of the season. But a key to changing your family’s food culture is to tune into what the season brings. Commit to shop the farmers’ market once a month - it’s an easy way to rid your pantry of packaged foods and learn to buy in season. When you shop the grocery store, look for “locally” grown foods. In the winter months, avoid airplane foods (foods flown in from a different hemisphere) by choosing foods that are grown on the same continent as where you live - no fresh strawberries in January if you’re living in Chicago.

Habit #7: Keep Trying

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When you approach cooking as a way to have fun together- to inspire creativity and curiosity - you’ll find that you and your kids engage in a completely different and more meaningful way. That kitchen play - that game - becomes habit-forming. And those healthy habits, that will serve your kids for a lifetime, are formed because of the series of small, positive experiences you have together. Your kids will benefit from the experience of cooking and exploring together, even if (at first) they don’t taste what they make. There’s learning, just maybe not the learning you planned. So instead of focusing on getting your kids to eat their vegetables, focus on the experience and make it fun. That’s how to get kids to eat healthy.