8 Surprising Traits of Predatory People

As a child, we are pretty poor at identifying predators around us. It’s often in retrospect that we discover what they did and how it was manipulative. You would think that in adulthood we would be much more accurate at picking out predators, especially for those who have been victims as a child. Unfortunately, that’s a naïve thought.

Adults still run into predators, befriending them and bringing them into their lives, without any thought that they need to guard their heart. So many of us still are unable to discern when it comes to recognizing predatory people. We could avoid a ton of heartache and pain if we had a better understanding of the traits to look out for when creating new friendships and relationships. Spare yourself from engaging too deeply with a predatory person and learn how they can be manipulative, narcissistic sociopaths.

Learn these eight signs so that you don’t get caught up in an abusive and predatory situation.

They fake emotions.

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Predatory people are masters at being able to fake emotions including kindness and intimacy. Predators are chameleons in that they know positive emotions are important in relationships. They pretend to be whatever it is they need to be in order to gain your trust; however their heart is not in it. A predatory person will find a person’s weaknesses and exploit them to their benefit. They may go out of the way to tell intimate secrets that they say is only for the victim to know, which makes them feel special and fosters a feeling of exclusivity. By the time the victim realizes it is all for show, they are already trapped. They’re lured through kindness, but harmed through abuse and control.

They must be in control.

Abusive people thrive under only one circumstance: when they have control over another. The predatory person will do anything to maintain complete autonomy over another person’s decisions, thoughts, and interactions with others. They will isolate the victim from friends and family leaving them feeling vulnerable. Whenever the victim begins to assert their rights, huge fights ensue where the victim is slammed further into submission or they flee. Surprisingly, many victims tend to repeat the cycle of abuse and search for new partners that have narcissistic and predatory traits. They believe that if they can get a terrible type of person to love them, it means that they are finally loveable. This of course does not end well, as predatory narcissists don’t love other people, they exploit them.

They are personable.

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This is the most surprising traits to understand and can be the hardest to swallow. Our idea of a predator is one that drives around in a creepy white van that tries to kidnap children. But in actuality, they can be quite normal on the outside and blend into society very well. They’re often the life of the party, excellent conversationalists, fun to be around. It will not be until you have spent significant time with the person that you start to realize their true motives. When you complain to someone else about their belittling behavior, the other person is utterly shocked. They’ve only known the predator when the predator is “on.” Others may have a difficult time believing that their kindhearted and charismatic neighbor is actually an abuser in disguise.

They have low self-worth.

This is another one that seems incredibly counterintuitive. You would think that a narcissist, sociopathic predator wouldn’t even need to worry about self-worth because they gain power from hurting and controlling others. However, they reasons they commit these terrible acts is because they’re deeply ashamed of who they truly are. In other words, they are like a typical school-yard bully. They’re usually compensating for some sort of early childhood wound. Instead of grieving their past in a healthy way, they are making others pay for their sadness. They tear down the self-esteem of their victims because they cannot handle someone else being happy or comfortable in their own skin.