The Apostle Paul says in Ephesians 5:31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
Marriage is about becoming one, the question is, which one?
Regular church attendance and the application of what is learned in this context produces seven benefits for the married couple. Why is this?
Environment has a lot to do with which one the married couple becomes over time and especially early in the marriage relationship. When they are in the early stages of birthing and raising children and identifying their core values by which they will lead and govern their home.
The data tells us that Americans who regularly attend church are between about 30 and 50 percent less likely to divorce. They are also about 15 percentage points more likely to say they are happily married, compared to couples who do not attend church together.
It Increases Success and Satisfaction in Marriage
Psychological and physiological studies show that proximity is key to connection regardless of the relationship in view. We must be in proximity to one another for something to ultimately have its greatest benefit.
God created the first couple spiritually and relationally in proximity to one another.
It Reinforces the Original Design of Marriage Proximity
When God created the first married couple, Adam and Eve, He created them, male and female. Genesis 1 tells us; He created them in His own image. He told them to be fruitful and multiply. He told them to have dominion over the plants and animals. He told them to subdue everything and everyone in the world they lived in and to tend the Garden.
Everything about marriage was established in the presence of Almighty God in the context of proximity of their physical, spiritual and mental relationship with one another.
Not only did God create marriage in proximity to one another for the purpose of companionship, vocational purpose, and reproduction but also to show us a model of relationship He shares with humanity.
It Reminds the Couple of the Relationship They Share With Jesus
Why is this a benefit?
Marriage is the relationship God targets as a means of sharing His relationship with us. We learn of this in Ephesians 5. The Apostle Paul says, “Wives should submit themselves to their husbands as they do to the Lord because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body.”
God also tells the husbands in this passage to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her.
The relationship that a husband shares with a wife is to the be the same as the relationship that Jesus shares with the church. This is so vital and important to understanding why church attendance is important not just for proximity but also so we can learn how to love one another, submit to one another, and function in a marriage relationship like Jesus does with the church.
Our rhythm of church attendance increases our chances of understanding how to function in relationship with one another as we learn how Christ functions in relationship with us as the church.
It Increases the Understanding of How to Function Properly in Marriage
The church is Christ’s bride, that includes both male and female. By both husband and wife relating to Christ as His Bride, they learn how to function in healthier, holier, and happier ways with one another in marriage. As a husband, he learns what it is like to be a bride to Christ. As a wife, she learns what is like to be a bride to Christ. As couples they learn what it is like to be loved by a perfect husband. And these touch points enable the couple to learn how to function in their role as husband and wife.
Unfortunately, Ephesians 5 has often been seen as a means of subverting wives and elevating husbands. This is not the goal. Ephesians 5:21 says, “Submit to one another as to Christ.” The context of marriage is first to Christ. If the couple attends church together, the hope is that the church teaches the couple how to function in a holy and healthy way with each other not with dominance or neglect but with sincerity of service and submission to one another fulfilling the roles given to each of them to show the relationship they share with Christ.
It Places the Couple in an Environment Made For Marriage
Church attendance places the married couple in an environment that teaches them how to function in marriage in healthy ways through not determining worth or value, but through teaching proper order. This in turn teaches them how to feel tremendous value from the relationship because it models that as Christ loves us, we are to love each other.
The order of marriage described in the Bible unfortunately becomes the fixated focus of many or most churches, sadly, to the determent of the benefit. Therefore, it is important to attend a church that teaches proper order for the sake of value in the marriage relationship. When this is identified and engaged, happiness, holiness, and healthiness results from it.
Now, not without disagreement or prolonged discussion for understanding from time to time, but ultimately attending church where the value that comes from the marriage relationship is the focus, the health of the marriage and functionality of the marriage increases.
When the marriage relationship is fostered by regular church attendance in a church environment that teaches marriage as the relationship that models our relationship to Jesus, they are then able to learn their marriage becomes the primary vehicle by which Jesus teaches them how to be in real relationship with Him.
So, when the couple learns how to be in relationship with Jesus through regular church attendance, then they can apply those same principles to their marriage relationships so that they can experience the same good with each other.
It Teaches the High Value and Sanctity of Marriage
Marriage is a high and noble calling that models the relationship the church shares with Jesus. And thus, the couple learns the remarkable value of marriage through regular church attendance. By being in an environment that values marriage and the marriage bed, the couple experiences wise safeguards, respectful attitudes, and exclusivity with each other through this Biblically reinforced environment of marriage.
Meaning, the church not only teaches the couple what a marriage is but how it is to look day to day in how they interact with each other and how they protect this sacred space they share exclusively with one another.
It Models What a Day-to-Day Marriage Should Look Like
It is easy to lose sight of the value of marriage in a world that doesn’t value it. It is easy to give up on each other and start to look in another direction for satisfaction in marriage when the marriage has seasons of struggle.
Consistent church attendance keeps you grounded in an environment that is for the marriage relationship and reinforces ways and ideas that enable it to function day to day in healthy ways and life-giving ways for a lifetime. May married couples be encouraged to lean into regular church attendance for the sake of their own satisfaction with each other and ultimately for the glory of Jesus and the good of their children.
