Husbands are the foundation of a family. They help lead and guide each member to be the best they can be, which is an incredible responsibility and power blessed on them by God. God expects husbands to love their family, in particular their wives, as Christ has loved them.
A family cannot grow spiritually, emotionally, or physically if a husband just not step up and show up. It takes an incredible amount of vulnerability to do so, but when a man does his wife and family will flourish.
Here are the ways that a husband should love his wife.
Forgive Her
Jesus made breakfast for Peter, who had sinned against Him and denied Him three times at His crucifixion (John 21:12-15). He was able to do that by forgiving Peter of His sins, and continuing to love Him despite what had happened. This is the type of forgiveness that husbands should be emulating.
We all know the amazing sacrifice that Jesus gave us up on that cross. He showed each and every one of us grace and compassion when we didn't deserve it, including your wife. You should be the first to move towards reconciliation when arguments arise in your marriage, just as Jesus would have done.
Love Her Continuously
Jesus never takes a pause from loving your wife. He never gets so angry that He forgets He loves her, or sees someone else and lets her slip from His mind. Jesus is always perusing her love and affection (Psalm 37:4).
In Luke 15:4-7, Jesus talks about the importance of being a tireless Shepherd, who will always go after the one sheep that runs away even if he has 99 more still at home. Jesus will love each of us consistently and without any breaks, despite what else may come our way. Husbands can learn from this example by consistently seeking a deeper relationship with their wives, no matter what else happens.
Appreciate Who She Is
Jesus never will "put up" with your wife. He never holds grudges, gets frustrated, and wants to throw in the towel over little problems. Jesus loves to love your wife because she is exactly who she is - flaws and all. He is delighted to be a part of your wife's life. Hebrews 12:2 says "He receives joy by giving us joy". Your wife should always feel that you love her deeply and joyfully. This will make her feel so appreciated, wanted, and needed. Your love to her should be so powerful that others notice it too.
Be a Servant
Jesus never stopped serving others, and serves your wife daily now. There is nothing your wife could ask from the Lord that He would consider to be too much. In Ephesians 5:25 it says: "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her." Husbands should never think of themselves as being the king of the home that should be served, but rather the other way around. Jesus gave up Himself for your wife and you should as well. You can be Christ-like in your marriage by getting on the ground and doing the dirty work, as Christ grabbed a towel and basin and washed the feet of His disciples (John 13:12-17).
Show Compassion
Jesus demands compassion from us. The Greek word used here for compassion is “eleos” which could also be translated “mercy.” Let's face it, the kind of mercy that you receive in Christ Jesus each day you do not deserve, but He gives it anyway. You want to love your wife in the same way Jesus did, by showing her compassion and mercy. There is nothing your wife can do that disqualifies her from seeing that compassion inside of you.
Meet Her Needs
Jesus is able to provide your wife with everything she needs in life - spiritually, physically, and emotionally. Do you ever stop to take a moment and understand what your wife needs? Do you strive to fill these needs so that she can lead a strong and happy life? God provides her with everything so that she can grow and flourish. Ephesians 5:28 says "in the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies." You should love your wife as deeply as you love your own self, and that means doing whatever you can to lift her up.
Share the Word of God
One way Jesus showed others that they were loved is by teaching them the Word of God. Jesus wants your wife to know Him and Christianity. If we are to love our wives as Jesus loves the Church, we are to study the word so that we may teach or wives the word. Learning the word of God in order to teach the word of God is not reserved just for pastors and bishops, it is expected of every believer, especially husbands. Being a leader of the family, we can compare ourselves to being pastors of the family. We are leaders that should teach our families the truth of Jesus.
Jesus is the perfect example of how we should love others, especially our wives. If you love want to show your life a powerful and unconditional love, take these lessons straight from the Bible. God outlined how we can lead our families to greatness, and the first step in doing so is delivering the lover your wife deserves.
