Top 6 Dos and Don’ts Women Wish They Could Tell Men

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“Women are from Venus; men are from Mars.” The old quote is a funny play on the idea that men and women are so different that they may as well be from different planets. There is a lot of truth to this. Men and women, after all, have different organs, different musculature and are easily identifiable by nothing more than the shape of their bones. There are also neurological differences between the two sexes. All of this adds up to make it so that men and women are inherently very different. As such, they sometimes struggle to make themselves understood to the other gender. Men are especially prone to complaining that women are overly complicated and difficult. For centuries, men have bemoaned the fact that, to them, women make absolutely no sense. It does not, however, have to be like this. Women are not as baffling as many men think. They are simply different. The confusion comes when men are caught off guard by the differences between the sexes. There are, though, a number of things women wish men knew. Women would be much less of a mystery to men if they could just share these six dos and don’ts that every woman wishes her man knew.

“Compliment me on something other than my appearance.”

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Women like to hear that they are beautiful. Compliments on their appearance will make them smile. Men know this well. Unfortunately, that sometimes means that all of their compliments focus on a woman’s appearance. After all, that is what they want to hear, right? Not quite. Women like it when you compliment them on their appearance, it is true, but if you only ever praise her looks, she will think that is the only reason you are interested in her.

Appearance-based compliments are fine for a first or second date, but as you get to know her, you should have found other things about her that you like. Praise her sense of adventure or fearlessness. Tell her that you admire her for all the volunteering she does in the community or that you love how she always tries to help people. Compliment her brains, her dry sense of humor or resourcefulness. She likes it that you think she is beautiful, but she needs to know you care about more than just her looks.

“Don’t get clingy.”

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Both genders are capable of becoming something one step down from codependent, but women tend to have the reputation of getting clingy. The stereotype is certainly that the woman is forever trying to spend time with her exasperated man. This, however, is not always the case. Just as many men as women are obsessed with spending every spare moment with their significant other and remaining in constant contact. This is going to suffocate her. She cares about you, but she wanted a partner, not a particularly chatty tumor. You need to give her some space. If she is not answering your texts, do not send her seven more hoping that the ninth time is the charm. If she does not want to go out one weekend, understand that she might have other things she needs to get done. No one likes a clingy partner, so give her some space to breathe.

“Make it clear when it’s a date.”

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Fun fact, studies have shown what anecdotal evidence has always supported. Men and women interpret each other’s signals differently. Women often interpret a man’s signs of sexual or romantic interest as nothing more than overtures of friendship. Men, on the other hand, tend to read women’s friendly gestures as signals that they are interested in romantic or sexual partnerships. This is likely part of why men wail about being “friendzoned,” and women cannot understand why every man she spends more than 30 seconds talking to seems to think she wants to date him. Cut through the miscommunication and make it clear when you are asking her on a date. Do not chicken out and suggest that the two of you “hang out” or “get together sometime.” Ask her on an actual date. She will appreciate your honesty and likely be impressed by your confidence. Even if she ends up turning you down, it is better to know from the beginning that she is not interested than to build up some glorious fantasy in your head only to find out that what you think is a fourth date is just two friends hanging out in her mind.

“Cut the machismo crap.”

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Acting macho and like a real tough guy might impress other men, but it does absolutely nothing to impress women. The vast majority of women want nothing to do with a man’s obsession with his own masculinity. Women prefer it when a man is confident enough in his own skin to be vulnerable or do things that other men might tease him for doing.

Women are not interested in someone who has to be the most macho man in the room, but at least with that guy, they know what they are getting if they date him. The last thing they want is to decide to date the you who is willing to be vulnerable around them only to find that you start acting like a lumberjack on steroids as soon as another man enters the room. That means, if you agree to go shopping with your wife or your girlfriend and you run into some of you male friends, do not start moaning about how you were dragged into shopping or laugh off your woman’s complaints whenever another man is watching. Doing so shows that you do not have any confidence in yourself and that you lack any real respect for her.

“Get creative with date ideas.”

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Dinner and a movie is a classic date idea. It is great for a first date when you cannot be sure if you will actually have anything in common with your date and want to guarantee that you have something to discuss over dinner. So long as you two can agree on the movie genre and type of food, it is also the sort of outing that is likely to make just about any date happy. Who does not like movies and food?

Classic date ideas are fine at the beginning of a relationship and can be fun to revive when you two have been together for a long time, but if you want to keep her interest, you need to get a little more creative than movies or coffee. Do something that neither of you have ever done before or invite her to join you at an event that centers around one of your passions. If you volunteer, see if she wants to join you at a fundraiser. If you know that she is crazy about the outdoors, go hiking. More creative dates show both that you were listening when she described her interests and that you are trying to draw her further into your own life by sharing your passions with her.

“Never try to change me.”

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When you start dating someone, you should be happy to enter a relationship with the person they are at that moment. You should not begin a relationship with one eye on how you could help or who you could force them into becoming. Otherwise, you are not dating a real person. You are dating a figment of your imagination who will likely never exist.

Do not try to change someone you are dating. If they have a small habit that drives you up the wall, you can try and get them to break that habit. If it is a dealbreaker, do not date them until either they stop of their own volition or you are willing to put up with it. Do not nitpick over what may seem like little things either. You may not think you are trying to change her when you never try to convince her to give up her love of the great outdoors or her martial arts hobby, but if you continually try to get her to cut her hair to a style you prefer or dress differently, you are trying to change her. Either be happy with the person she is now, or find someone else to date.