Have you ever wondered if you’ve made a mistake? That there’s something you’ve done wrong in your past? Maybe you didn't try hard enough in an old relationship and made mistakes, or maybe you let someone go you still care about. You start to think if it would be a good idea to get back together with your ex.
While it might seem like a good idea at first, it's not. There is a reason why you both to leave the relationship, even if you don't think about it now. The Lord has a great plan for our lives, and someone very special in store for us. However, we can't see that if we are going back to the people who were wrong for us.
Here are some reasons why God doesn't want you to be dating your ex.
God Wants You to Be Single
Are you worried that you have been single for too long? Do you feel that you are running out of time to get married? Maybe if you only tried to look harder, went to a different church, were a bit thinner, than you would have found the man of your dreams. You start considering getting back with men you dated in your past, simply so you can feel like you are on the right path that society has laid out. All of these thoughts are very negative on our self-esteem.
It’s hard to learn to be comfortable spending time alone and being single, but it’s a valuable lesson. Many people slip back into toxic relationships because they don’t know how to be alone. However, being single can actually be great for your mental health, and being comfortable with being alone is an important skill to learn.
There isn't one reason why you are single, but you should know that God wants it that way. God wants us to deal with our singleness by remembering that He knows what is best for our life. Getting back with an ex will derail the plans He has for your singleness. When you question God about why you are single, you have to come back to the fact that He’s in control and has a reason for everything He does.
God Has Someone Better in Store For You
God doesn’t want you going back to your ex for one huge reason: He has someone better for you! Trusting in God’s timing is way easier said than done, but it’s important to try and be patient if it means your happiness in the long run. God has someone special in mind for you, because He knows you are worthy of a safe, secure and happy marriage. Don’t pass up on the opportunity to meet the love of your life because you settled for an old fling.
God Knows the Pain You Went Through
When asking yourself if you want to reenter a relationship with your ex, revisit the reasons why your relationship ended. Ask yourself, if you got back together now, would the same problem still be there? The answer is most likely yes. People can grow up and become more responsible; however the core of someone doesn't change. God knows all the pain you went through during your breakup, and He doesn't want you to go back down that same past. The toxic parts of the relationship won't automatically disappear just because it's been a few months.
God Knows Your Worth
The reason why God doesn't want to watch you go through the pain of past relationships is because He knows your worth. God sees you as someone that is worthy of true love, respect, honesty, and happiness. He can't give that to you when you go back to a poisonous relationship. One great thing about being single is having the freedom to focus only on yourself, and build up your self-esteem. If you are limiting yourself to only past relationships because you don’t think you deserve better, this is a time to step back and reflect on how you can grow your self-worth.
God Wants You to Rely on Him
Sometimes you might break down because you feel lonely all the time. You scream at God that you want someone to enter into your life, so you don't have to go it alone anymore. You start considering past toxic relationships so you don't have to be alone. However, you are never alone. God wants you to choose to rely on Him in your singleness, not on others. That’s where He wants you to be, totally and completely dependent on Him. You’re not alone because He’s always with you (Psalm 73:23). Instead of trying to fight Him on your singleness, choose to fix your loneliness by building a more intimate relationship with the Lord. God says to cast all your cares on Him, because He cares for you (I Peter 5:7).
God Doesn't Want Relationships to Become Your Idols
Idolatry is a sin we are repeatedly warned about in the Bible. An idol can be anything you desire more than God, and relationships are very subject to such idolatry. If your past relationship was the highest priority in your life and dictated almost every aspect of it, including your time, your focus, your finances and your walk with God then it was an idol. Did you drop your godly standard to accommodate their behavior? There is a reason God may have separated you and your ex, because it meant you were not focusing on Him like you should have. Question your heart's true desire, and figure out if you are trying to reenter the relationship for the right reasons.
Getting back with an ex is never a good idea, no matter which way you try and justify it. There is a plan for your life already, and that path leads you to the “one” handpicked directly from God. Don’t waste your time dating someone you already know is wrong for you, and instead invest your single years into creating a better relationship with God.
